Confession # 1: I admire people who don’t use Facebook.
Confession # 2: I will probably never be one of those people.
I’ve tried. I really have. I’ve deactivated my account on numerous occasions. But I always come crawling back. It’s the thrill of the snoop, the thrill of catching up with old “friends”, and the thrill of projecting the very best image of Natalie that I can.
I admire people who don’t use Facebook for one simple fact: because they don’t need it. I bet if you surveyed a group of non-Facebook users you would come away with one common theme: they are secure enough and satisfied enough in their real life relationships that they don’t try to get affirmation from the online ones.
I’m not saying that the friends you have online aren’t real friends. But I do have to ask, if you didn’t have Facebook, would you even invest in half of those friendships? Do you even invest in half of those friendships? A quarter? A tenth?
I really believe that those who dwell in the realm of no Facebook enjoy rich and meaningful friendships and wonder why they would add the time and hassle to their lives of “connecting” with people that they actually wouldn’t really choose to connect with.
So why do we do it?
I think it’s in part because it gives us a place to share who we are (just like this blog). But this can quickly transform into a place to share who we want to be. The beautiful one. The smart one. The popular one. The one who gets all the chicks. The one who has the most “friends”, or the one who gets the most “likes”. We start to market ourselves on Facebook.
There is difference between shameless self promotion and sharing something that is actually good and beneficial to the public. I used to always post my new blog entries on Facebook, but the truth is, I can only count a handful of times when I felt the “conviction” to share what I had written with my Facebook “friends.” The reality is that I loved the way it felt to post a new blog and then see how many likes and comments I could get. I was addicted to checking my WordPress stats.
I have shifted to a place where it doesn’t really matter to me who reads my blog anymore. I write because I love to write. I don’t write because I get busy. And if I don’t feel like writing, well…that’s a problem that I have to fix. And to those who have remained faithful readers – even after I stopped including blog posts in status updates – thank you!
So even though I may never get rid of Facebook entirely, I hope that my attitude towards it will become like this blog: that I’m not trying to impress and that I am true to who Natalie is. And if that happens, then maybe I’ll actually go through my list and remove those people who aren’t really my friends anyway… ;)